Keith Waterhouse Quotes

• I turn over a new leaf every day. But the blots show through.

  Keith Waterhouse

  New Day, Leafs, Shows

  Keith Waterhouse (2012). “Keith Waterhouse: Collected Plays”, p.66, Oberon Books

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• Ninety-five percent of all statistics, including this one, are bogus.

  Keith Waterhouse

  Statistics, Ninety, Five

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• I cannot bring myself to vote for a woman who has been voice-trained to speak to me as though my dog has just died.

  Keith Waterhouse

  Dog, Voice, Vote

  "Paperbacks" by Jonathan Heawood, www.theguardian.com. July 8, 2001.

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• Un proceso de consulta es lo que alguna autoridad pone en marcha como preparación para hacer lo que pretendía desde el principio.

  Keith Waterhouse

  Authority, Process, Consultation

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• Never look to politicians to solve your problems, they will only create new ones.

  Keith Waterhouse

  Looks, Problem, Politician

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• Should not the Society of Indexers be known as Indexers, Society of, The?

  Keith Waterhouse

  Should, Known

  Keith Waterhouse (1992). “Jeffrey Bernard is unwell ; Mr and Mrs Nobody ; and, Bookends”

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• Life is a campus: in a Greenwich Village bookstore, looking for a New Yorker collection, I asked of an earnest-looking assistant where I might find the humour section. Peering over her granny glasses, she enquired, "Humour studies would that be, sir?"

  Keith Waterhouse

  Divertido, Humor, Gafas

  The Spectator, January 15, 1994.

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• Trying to keep up with current slang sucks.

  Keith Waterhouse

  Trying, Currents, Slang

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• Lying in bed, I abandoned the facts again and was back in Ambrosia.

  Keith Waterhouse

  Lying, Bed, Facts

  Billy Liar ch. 1 (1959)

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• The longer an event is anticipated-a milestone birthday, an eclipse, a new millennium-the more likely it is to be an anti-climax.

  Keith Waterhouse

  Events, Eclipse, Millennium

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• The 50s face was angry, the 60s face was well-fed, the 70s face was foxy. Perhaps it was the right expression: there was a lot to be wary about.

  Keith Waterhouse

  Expression, Faces, Feds

  1979 In the Observer Magazine, 30 Dec.

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