Lewis Grizzard Citas

• I know lots of people who are educated far beyond their intelligence.

  Lewis Grizzard

  People, Educated, Knows

  Lewis Grizzard (1995). “Life Is Like a Dogsled Team . . . If You're Not the Lead Dog, the Scenery Never Changes: The Wit and Wisdom of Lewis Grizzard”, Longstreet Press

  2233 Copiar cita

• Es difícil pensar en otra cosa que no sea agradable mientras se come un tomate de cosecha propia.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Summer, Food, Garden

  1646 Copiar cita

• In the south there's a difference between 'Naked' and 'Nekkid.' 'Naked' means you don't have any clothes on. 'Nekkid' means you don't have any clothes on and you're up to somethin'.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Mean, Differences, Clothes

  1696 Copiar cita

• La única forma que se me ocurre de mejorar la Coca-Cola, uno de los elixires más deliciosos de la vida, que según los estudios cura a los enfermos y a veces resucita a los muertos, es ponerle bourbon.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Drinking, Sick, Way

  1635 Copiar cita

• El juego de la vida se parece mucho al fútbol. Tienes que afrontar tus problemas, bloquear tus miedos y marcar tus puntos cuando tengas la oportunidad.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Motivación, Éxito, Fútbol

  Lewis Grizzard (1990). “Gettin' it on: a down-home treasury”, BBS Publishing Corporation

  1531 Copiar cita

• No hay nada como ser demasiado sureño.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Southern, Guidance, Too Busy

  1638 Copiar cita

• "Have you done your homework?" my mother would ask. "I'll do it later." "You will do it now, young man. I don't want you winding up on the third shift at Flagg-Utica." Flagg-Utica was a local textile plant. Somehow, I never could figure how failing to read three chapters in my geography book about the various sorts of vegetation to be found in a tropical rain forest had anything to do with facing a life as a mill hand. But with enough guilt and fear as catalysts, you can read anything, even geography books and Deuteronomy.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Mother, Fear, Rain

  1605 Copiar cita

• Baptists never make love standing up. They're afraid someone might see them and think they're dancing.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Thinking, Dancing, Making Love

  Lewis Grizzard (1995). “Life Is Like a Dogsled Team . . . If You're Not the Lead Dog, the Scenery Never Changes: The Wit and Wisdom of Lewis Grizzard”, Longstreet Press

  1380 Copiar cita

• It's better to have died a small child than to be a politician who gets caught in a scandal during a slow news month.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Children, News, Scandal

  Lewis Grizzard (1995). “Life Is Like a Dogsled Team . . . If You're Not the Lead Dog, the Scenery Never Changes: The Wit and Wisdom of Lewis Grizzard”, Longstreet Press

  1373 Copiar cita

• Si llamas a un perro, se romperá el cuello para llegar hasta ti. Los perros sólo quieren agradar. Llama a un gato y su actitud será: "¿Qué gano yo?".

  Lewis Grizzard

  Funny, Dog, Attitude

  1362 Copiar cita

• Los yanquis no entienden que la forma de hablar de los sureños es un lenguaje de matices. Lo que podemos hacer en el Sur es tomar una palabra y cambiarla un poco para que signifique algo totalmente distinto.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Mean, Yankees, Talking

  1376 Copiar cita

• En lugar de volver a casarme, voy a buscar a una mujer que no me guste y le voy a dar una casa.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Divertido, Matrimonio, Hilarante

  1280 Copiar cita

• Life is like a dogsled race. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Leadership, Dog, Race

  1180 Copiar cita

• The idiot who invented instant grits also thought of frozen fried chicken, and they ought to lock him up before he tries to freeze-dry collards.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Trying, Locks, Frozen

  Lewis Grizzard (1990). “Gettin' it on: a down-home treasury”, BBS Publishing Corporation

  1108 Copiar cita

• Vengo de una familia numerosa. De hecho, nunca pude dormir sola hasta que me casé.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Marriage, Inspiration, Sleep

  921 Copiar cita

• If soccer was an American soft drink, it would be Diet Pepsi

  Lewis Grizzard

  Soccer, Pepsi, Would Be

  777 Copiar cita

• El dinero no crece en los árboles, y si lo hiciera otro sería el dueño del huerto.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Money, Tree, Grows

  "Heapin' Helping of True Grizzard: Down Home Again with Lewis Grizzard".

  800 Copiar cita

• El sexo pervertido implica el uso de plumas de pato. En el sexo pervertido se utiliza el pato entero.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Sex, Ducks, Use

  757 Copiar cita

• God bless Merle Haggard. He did all the things that Johnny Cash was supposed to have done.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Done, Cash, God Bless

  Lewis Grizzard (1995). “Life Is Like a Dogsled Team . . . If You're Not the Lead Dog, the Scenery Never Changes: The Wit and Wisdom of Lewis Grizzard”, Longstreet Press

  810 Copiar cita

• There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Amor, Divertido, Vida

  Lewis Grizzard (1989). “Don't Bend Over in the Garden, Granny, You Know Them Taters Got Eyes”, Ballantine Books

  796 Copiar cita

• I'd much rather sit next to a smoker in a restaurant than a nose-blower.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Smoking, Noses, Next

  802 Copiar cita

• Si alguna vez vuelvo a Georgia, me clavaré los pies en el suelo.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Feet, Nails, Georgia

  Lewis Grizzard (2012). “If I Ever Get Back to Georgia, I'm Gonna Nail My Feet to the Ground”, p.2, NewSouth Books

  744 Copiar cita

• I finally figured it out, I finally figured out how to find some peace and happiness. I sure would hate for the man upstairs to take me now. But at least I did figure it out.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Hate, Men, Aging

  760 Copiar cita

• Today's sensitive male has learned to share in open frank discussions about relationships like, "Where the hell did you get a crazy idea like that? You been reading Redbook again?"

  Lewis Grizzard

  Crazy, Reading, Learning

  724 Copiar cita

• I get letters from people who say, 'What have you got against women?' What could I possibly have against women? I've married three of them.

  Lewis Grizzard

  People, Letters, Three

  Lewis Grizzard (1990). “Gettin' it on: a down-home treasury”, BBS Publishing Corporation

  577 Copiar cita

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